Sunday, June 28, 2009

Pre-Draft Press Photo Phun

Catching these guys in these clothes in this setting two days before the draft is indeed rare air. Aside from that amazingly bland guy who's "going to be on Letterman" named Blake Griffin, every one of these guys didn't know where they were going to get drafted/how much they were going to get paid at this particular moment in time. The nervous innocence of the unknown is in each of these guy's eyes, and that is awesome.

Blake Griffin: the swagger that comes with certainty leads Blake to dribble two brand-new Spauldings like a jackoff and hang his phallic tie between his legs. I bet this picture turns NBA groupies on as the Spauldings indeed look like testies and the tie is obviously his wang. Something tells me that because Griffin is such a big man, his junk doesn't look proportional.

For a seven-footer, Thebeet actually looks like a normal person. His arms are cocked just-so, his lower body isn't in frame, and his head bone seems proportional to his upper body bone. The smile puts us at ease and his shrug says to us "hey man, where ever I get drafted is just fine with me". Maybe, like Blake, Hasheem knew he was going to get picked second/get paid. The only question is if that sweater was a triple or quadruple XL.

For all the talk of Ricky not having played basketball for a month and, therefore, failing his man vs. chair workout for Sac Kings braintrust Petrie and Westphal; Rubio sure seems to be handling the rock with ease while in dress shoes. This, along with the floppy hairdo and ability to pass in crazy ways, proves to me that Ricky will be the next Steve Nash. It has nothing to do with them both being white non-American point guards. Nothing at all. I can see past color. My one question with Rubio is who the hell wears a blazer with a golf shirt underneath yet still sports the pocket square? I mean, decide on your look here my Spanish friend: are you formal or are you casual? And while you're at it, please answer me why it was OK with you to play in Sacramento but not in Minnesota? Is Sac really that much better? Who's advising this guy?

Speaking of the Kings, here is Tyreke Evans posing for his High School picture. No, not the photo snapped for the yearbook. But the one where you get to hold something that defines you, like a basketball, that your mom ordered in wallet size and one 8 by 10 that is put in a nice wooden frame, and displayed in the middle of the shelf dedicated to showing off your 31 basketball trophies you've accumulated by the time you were a Senior.
*NBA Photographer: "hey, Tyreke my man. Why don't you do some dribbling and smile for America?"
*Tyreke: "Nah, that's alright"
*NP: "well, the world wants to see what you've us your flair!"
*T: "I said, 'Nah', alright?"
*NP: "OK, let's just have you sit down right here holding the ball"

The polar opposite of Tyreke comes in next. All attitude, 100% flair. "I OWN this rock, muthafcuka" Jennings says in this snap. Brandon is all business, yet all fun at the same time. But most of all his game revolves around confidence. Gutsy enough to pass on Arizona to be the first High School graduate to play overseas (Italy) and call Ricky Rubio overrated, Brandon doesn't give a fcuk if he's drafted 5th or 25th. He doesn't care if he shows up late to the draft or if social networking gets him in trouble as he keeps it real. Lookout, world. Brandon Jennings is here.

You know who else is here? Tyler Hansbrough, y'all. Tyler will win National Player of the Year as Junior, pass JJ Redick as the all-time ACC scoring leader, get drafted by the Pacers joining fellow teammates Mike Dunleavy, Troy Murphy, Jeff Foster and Travis Diener to potentially produce the first All-White-American lineup in the NBA since 1967, AND will sell you life insurance with his off-kilter belt and pleated khaki colored slacks. Can't wait.

Awkward? Yes. Jordan Hill doesn't own a suit. Jordan Hill hired an agent who didn't think to get him a stylist for the NBA Pre-Draft Photo Shoot. Jordan Hill's photo session was right in between Jrue Holliday's and Brandon Jennings' so there wasn't a fellow seven-footer around who he could borrow a blazer from. It's been 4 years since Jordan Hill's cousin's wedding when he last had to wear a shirt that buttoned up. Jordan Hill is just going to hold a basketball in each of his hands and get the hell back to the hotel.

Um, why does the ball look so huge in relation to Stephen Curry? Is he REALLY 6'3"? People are calling Steph a point guard, even though he didn't play one in college. If he wanted to be seen as a Point Guard, you think that Steph would have held the Spaulding in a passing-manner instead of perfectly on his finger tips ready to launch a sweet three. Say nothing of his "come & get it, ladies" pelvic exposure and pinstripe pant + pattern sock combo.

Professor of Basketball, Syracuse University, Jonny Flynn, PHD. Jonny likes the style of Dwight Howard and coped his "Tight Sweater" look with perfection. Welcome to the first day of class, sukkas, Professor Flynn is 'bout to teach you a little sumthin' sumthin' about scoring 34 points in 6 Overtimes. But even Professors need to learn things such as how one is going to play alongside fellow rookie PG Ricky Rubio. Is new GM David Kahn an idiot? I say YES

Saturday, June 27, 2009

Press Hop

This is a great remix of the all time classic Press Conferences:

Thursday, June 25, 2009

Kobe's Dad

This video is circa 2006 but it is very interesting to hear Jelly Bean Bryant talk about being a Japanese Pro Basketball Coach and a former coach of the LA Sparks in the WNBA. I also enjoy how he whistles through his teeth when he talks.

I guess Jelly Bean keeps busy with his own life and doesn't need to get in the lime light with Kobe. Hence, the reason you never see him at games.

Props to Bilbo, The SportsGuy, and wherever Bilbo found this video

Best Surfing Trick Ever

This young Aussie, Jordy Smith, has pulled off what is being heralded as the "best surfing trick ever." All sports evolve I suppose! This is damned sick....not strapped in or anything. I'm seeing a few championships in his future.

Friday, June 19, 2009

Your (not mine) 08/09 Lakers Celebrate

Congratulations to the 08/09 NBA Champion Los Angeles Lakers. A few days ago the "team" celebrated in LA as Kobe wore a different t-shirt signifying his 4 championship rings. Thankfully, he's all about the team just enough to win the title but not enough to include himself with his teammates.

Ladies & Gentlemen: Your (not mine) 08/09 NBA Champion Los Angeles Laker Fans! Complete with sleeve tats, $200 vintage-yet-brand-new Ray Bans, Blu Tooth hangin' off the ear, and Kobe jerseys. How proud does this make you feel?

Goofy 7' Euro Center dances with pinheaded 6'4" American Shooting Guard. Gasol was huge this playoffs. Too bad he didn't get to shoot more than 11 times per game.

And without further ado, your 2009 NBA Playoff Bracket Results! With a tremendous leapfrog, Steve Strain banks a 19 with the Laker pick to move into 3rd place winning him Backstreet Boys Tickets. Congrats! Matt cruised to the championship picking the winner in 14/15 matchups (like everyone, he picked the Cavs to make the Finals). I picked 13/15 matchups and my game guessing narrowed the gap, but it wasn't quite enough. Please feel free to have Matt buy you a few rounds at the bar next time you see him as he wins $1,576.00. Nice work, bro (literally):

102 Points: Matt
100 Points: Cam
89 Points: Straino
81 Points: BK
76 Points: Nikki
74 Points: Ryan
66 Points: Nate
65 Points: Fed
63 Points: Scott S.
62 Points: Todd
60 Points: Bilbo, Pablo
59 Points: Toomie


You know that I only give you/link you to "quality" material on this site. And although Simmons puts up 4 podcasts a week, I've never asked you to listen to even one. But his recent phone call vs. phone call podcast (complete with shitty audio quality) with Dan Le Batard yesterday was really quite good. Starting off with Artie Lange on Joe Buck, the two-some went on to other important cultural issues. Have a listen and another post will be put up later this weekend complete with semi-original analysis.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Better Den Da NBA

Okay, here's the right link. Damn Intranets

Dis is Better Den Da NBA

Check out this Sprite Hosted Slam Dunk contest challenge from I don't know when. Judging by the Hip Hop styles of the dunkers and difficulty of the dunks, I guessing it's pretty recent.

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Artie Lange on HBO's "Joe Buck Live"

Yada yada yada. Yeah, The Nextian Challenge is over. Yeah, Matt won, I came in second and Tommy came in third (Cher tix). I'll have those results up in a minute/day. So hold tight. I'm still scouring through finals pics and want to have a memorable post for all the homeboys to feast on.

This summer I imagine this blog to take on a role of posting whatever it wants. And in this vein, here is a link to the only place on the net that has a video of Joe Buck's new show on HBO where Artie Lange of Howard Stern blasts him a new one. I have heard that there was more said regarding Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson but Home Box Office has taken everything down from Youtubes. I advise you to enjoy watch this and cringe knowing that Lange has recently lost 45 pounds:

Friday, June 12, 2009

Nextian Bracket Update

Hello Players of the Game. Many have asked and I have finally listened. Here are the updated Nextian NBA Bracket Playoff Challenge points. Movement in the standings will be had depending on when the Lakers finish off the Magic. But it looks like Matt will take this thing and Cam (me) will finish in 2nd (we both picked the Lakers to win the finals 4-3). The only race left is for the Backstreet Boyz tickets for the 3rd Place Finisher!

Numbers tell stories:

84 Points: Matt
82 Points: Cam
72 Points: Todd
70 Points: Straino
66 Points: Nate
65 Points: Fed
63 Points: Scott Snider
62 Points: BK
60 Points: Pablo, Bilbo
59 Points: Toomie
57 Points: Nikki
55 Points: Ryan

Mutha *uckin Gay Fish!

Here is a nice song from a South Park episode about 2 months ago. The episode featured a fake Kanye West not getting a joke the whole town of South Park got: "Do you like Fish Dicks? (said like fish sticks)?" Answer: Yes. "Then what are you, a gay fish?" Ahahhaah, I'm sure you get it. Well in this episode they ripped on Kanye for 23 minutes straight about not getting the joke when he is a self proclaimed genius.

Long story short, he thinks people keep calling him a gay fish because he indeed does love fish sticks. So at the end of the episode he thinks he has a vision of his real self as a gay guy whole likes other male fish, and decides to embrace his new life. The song at the end was cut off short...but I found it on YouTube...enjoy.

While We're On The Hip-Hop Tip....

I can admit to being out of "the game" now every since The Game released his first album in 2005. When it comes to hip-hop I have been taught not to fully trust what is on the radio or pimped on TV even though I initially might like what I'm hearing. This stems from fear of enjoying a track that's classified by people who know more than me as "wack". I've been safe in the aughts (the 2000's) by purchasing Dr. Dre 2001, OutKast albums, every Kanye album except his recent pile of garbage, Jay-Z's releases, some Lil' Wayne. If I've gone underground it has been for an album or two by The Coup, Clipse (if that's even considered "underground") and Ghostface Killa (harking back to my college day infatuation with Wu-Tang). So I pretty much have averaged two albums a year in hip-hop "purchases".

So what the hell is wrong with me? Does it have something to do with my age and lack of time to seek out new jams? Or has the industry just spewed garbage for nearly 10 years?

For answers to these questions, I turn to people who know more than me. Check out a great Hip-Hop analysis post (and enjoy many others mostly revolving around the NBA) from the Straight Bangin' Blog:


Thursday, June 11, 2009

Lil' Wayne Loves Kobe

A.K.A.- Mr. Make It Rain on them kutz!

OK, enough dropping LW lyrics of from the #2 album of 2008. Let's focus on the Lil' Wayne lyrics of this week. The cough syrup drinkin', auto tone abusin' rapper has released a song called "Kobe Bryant". You may have seen Mr. Lil' Wayne on First Take with Skip Bayless and at Laker games cheering on his favorite player. And now he has come full circle by writing a very timely track about Black Mamba.


If I was still in High School and cared ever so deeply about my favorite recording artists, I might give-a-shit about Lil' Wayne downgrading himself as a Kobe suckler. But now I'm old and could care less outside of the pure comedy aspect. Jeff, anyone in the OC bumping this track in their black Denali's with 24's and tinted windows? Probably.

UPDATE: Jeff, if you want to download this song and don't mind a few pop ups and advertisement's you can grab the track HERE

A Good Blog -- Gone

For the few months that this blog put out new and original content, it was very awesome. But they stopped writing material and ever since 4/29/09 we have had no new posts on "Stop Romanticizing The Favela". And that is very sad.

I still check the site weekly in hopes that they come up with something fresh, but for 45 days it has been nothing but re-reading the same awesome posts I originally fell in love with. And although I hesitate to pass this inkling of a diddy of a blog onto my "vast" universe of Nextians, I feel like you should at least enjoy what is here as SRTF has likely coughed up it's last post. If there ever was a reason for blogs to exist........ RIP, Favela.

Enjoy the link below to a fantastic stream of consciousness ramble:


If you can dig this, don't hesitate to get a kick out of the Rumor Hutches and other genre's of peeps and how the NBA plays in their lives. Hilarity ensues.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

2008 Beijing Olympics Gold Medal Game

The 2008 Men's Basketball Gold Medal Game in Beijing between the US and Spain is fun to look back on when thinking about the NBA Finals going on right now:

1. Kobe and Dwight were on the same team
2. Kobe and Gasol were on opposite teams
3. Gasol and Dwight did some serious battle
4. Ricky Rubio sliced and diced all game long (likely #2 pick in the draft)

You can find a full HD replay below. After the commercial "enlarge" the video, then click on the "Most Watched" eyeball on the left and you'll be able to find the game. A good watch if you didn't get up a 5:00am to watch the matchup live last summer


Commenting on the NBA Finals is futile at this point so spend some time on a great game that you probably missed.

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Leroy Smith: Trainer

Word on the street is that many potential first round draft picks in this year's draft trained with Leroy Smith, the man who motivated Michael Jordan. I advise you all to watch the infomercial for his DVD series.....

.....and check out his website (below) where you can get lost in many motivation videos and even play one of the greatest video games ever (according to Leroy).


Ariza & The Finals

Trevor Ariza was traded for Mo Evans and Brian Cook of the Lakers on November 20th, 2007 (the beginning of last season). Now he is the "long" guard contributer to the Lakers 2009 playoff run. Isn't that weird?

Monday, June 1, 2009

Lil' Dez

This one is hard to understand on TV so the HD You Tube is a must. Also, I think on TV they cut out the end where he's breathless from seeing all the shoes, but I could be wrong:

Mo Williams & His RC Car

Mo Williams of the Cleveland Cavs has it right on. If there ever was a clearer explanation to how this Cavs team feels right now, this is it. As you most likely know by now, Lebron James stormed off the court after the loss not congratulating the Magic. He then got dressed in 5 minutes, put his headphones on, and sat on the team bus not wanting to talk to teammates, friends, business partners or the press.

Here is Mo's quote after Saturday's loss to the Orlando Magic when asked if he had spoken to Lebron:

"I haven't talked to him yet. He's just disappointed. It's like you're at Christmastime and you want that remote control car. You've been begging your mom for the whole time, and Christmas comes, and you open up a present and you open up another present, another present, and you never see that remote control car. You can have 10 presents, but if you don't have that remote control car, you're going to be sad and disappointed anyway."