Friday, August 30, 2013

Laker Fan Reactions III

Laker Blog Commenters
Laker fans love their rings, their Kobe, and posting crazy online comments. Success has made some of them unrealistic pricks, but who can fault them. If the Warriors won a championship in my lifetime I'd act batshit crazy too. So let's comment on their comments.

If you as a LakerBlog author ever want the LakerLuvers to comment, you write an article like this.  What? We're not winning rings and someone is better than us?  Puh-lease.  "H8TURZ! Kobe is the GOAT! You're jealous!

Matt you funny u must be dreaming talking about the lakers run is over.u better stp smokking that shit.because kobe will get another ring n the lakers going to smash on the clippers bitch ass on openlying night

This was obviously a mobile phone comment.  Look at the lack of upper case on the "lakers".  Limited capitalization. No spacing after the completion of a sentence.  Amazing spelling mistakes that LakerLuver is too lazy to fix.  And this links to your Facebook account and others see it with your picture and everything about your life!  Way to put your best foot forward, LakerLuver.

The lakers going to smash on the clipppers on opening night.And matt the lakers run is never over the lakers are the better a lakers fan for life.

Somehow this guy is listed as a "Top Commenter" on his Facebook Profile plug-in. I want to know what the standards are for "Top Commenter" status.  This is some weak smack talk, I agree. Spelling mistakes and lower case all the way around yet again.

he can say what he want to but when the clippers dump him his run gone be over he a wack lightskinned cat anyway.

Like many LakerPosts, I had to re-read this one a few times.  I was really stuck on the "gone" word but after 17 seconds I realized that gone = going to.  Sorry, I'm slow. I'm a Warriors fan.  But what really sticks out is the comment on Barnes' skin color.  Since he's light skinned it sounds like some have problems with him.  I think it would have been more effective to comment on his Birdman Jr. tattoos instead.

Hahaha!  Great.  Simple, sweet, typical LakerLuver comment. The piece of smack talk that is never wrong or old.  Especially since Barnes was a Laker for two seasons. This piece of trash talk might actually sting Barnes...if he ever read it.

BOO Fat Barnes!
What?  I don't get it. He's not fat. So why am I laughing so hard?  Maybe there's a LakerLuver joke about Matt Barnes that I don't get.

This post actually had some insightful Laker Fans on it with excellent discussion.  But, of course, the LakerDouches pop up their heads and claims some straight bullshit.

If Nash is allowed to really run the offense he can average roughly 15 and 10. Kobe should let Nash help him average a very efficient 30 ppg average. OK maybe 28.

Roughly 15 and 10, but probably more like 15.56 and 10.31459, right?  And if Nash is doubling the amount of shots per game that he is shooting are you sure that Steve's 30 28 points per game will still be efficient?  Basketball doesn't work like that, commenter.  But what really takes this to LakerDouche status is the phrase "Kobe should let Nash help him..."  You're right, Kobe is a god and he dictates all things in the NBA.  Kobe should let Nash help him by scoring a measly 28 points.  If Nash scored 28 points a game last year, he would have been 3rd in the league in scoring.  But we're not sure if Kobe will do this next season.  You're saying it would be best if Kobe did, but you don't challenge Kobe to make this adjustment at all.  You approach it a very lightfooted way in the eternal presence of Vino24 and simply present him a suggestion.  Then you bow to his highness and scamper away like the uneducated LakerLuver you are.

His ass playing soccer and shit he better be ready for the season! I got faith in him though.

Nash does a publicity stunt by "trying out" with Inter-Milan and this is the first that this LakerLuver has ever heard of Steve Nash playing soccer.  I can't quite get what commenter was getting at, though. Does he think that playing soccer is a good off season activity for Nash? Or does he actually think that Nash should only be on the hardwood every day at 4:30 am like Vino24 getting ready for the upcoming season?  At least he has faith in Steve Nash. Gotta have faith.

oh, and one more thing -- i think nash should grow his hair out again. seems like he plays better with long hair. this may be a pointless comment, but hey.. i've had a beer or six.

An excellent observation made by LakerFan beer drinker. Long haired Steve is way better than Hollywood Stevie Nash.  That Great Gatsby haircut last year was terrible.

We are so spoiled by Kobe for years and we are forgetting that the standard he has given us is way up there for another superstar to meet. He just elevate the competition not just the Lakers but the entire NBA on how GREATNESS should be viewed and idolized. They only come once in every 15-20yrs and there is no denying when will be the next.. While only very few have done it, the others can only dream.

Greatness does indeed need to not only be viewed, but also idolized. LakerDouche makes a point of saying that greatness in some sort only comes around every 15-20 years (in the NBA, I'm guessing. Jordan --> Kobe is what he's referring to) but that there is no "denying when will be the next".  Not "denying", LakerDouche, is the wrong word.  "Saying" is what you were going for.  This comment is full of history, bravado and proclamations.  But it is pure LakerDouche that LeBron wasn't mentioned.  Oh, point to the rings, right. Kobe got those all by himself. I forgot.  My bad. I'm a jealous H8TUR.

  • Scottie Pippin Fights Fan

    Add it to the Trophy Case

    "LOS ANGELES -- Scottie Pippen won't face criminal charges for a fight with a man who authorities say was drunk when he demanded an autograph and photo with the former Chicago Bulls star, then faked seizures after claiming Pippen punched him in the face."

    Oh, the tough life of highly successful former NBA'ers. When you get bothered by drunk assholes while eating your dinner at a restaurant even simply punching them in the face leads to incredible drama. Front page of ESPN Chicago, people faking like they're hurt just to get some coin. Sometimes you wish that you were a normal civilian just so you can not be hassled by drunk assholes, or, if you happen to be hassled by a drunk asshole you can punch them in the face without it being front page news.........of ESPN Chicago.

    Actually, check that. Civilians punching other drunk asshole civilians in the face usually leads to getting arrested.  Unless you flee the scene, take a cab to another part of town, grab a slice of pizza right quick, eat it while walking home, and spend the rest of your strange evening with an iced right hand watching Falling Skies OnDemand.  So much for meeting your bros at the club.

    I guess Scottie Pippen can't exactly flee a scene after decking a dude. But he can get out of charges because he's famous and awesome.

    But if there's one retired NBA'er to prey on, it isn't Scottie Pippen. He got screwed with his contract with the Bulls, he's been swindled out of many millions, and he's recently claimed he was broke.  Please don't ask me to find links to these facts. This is just a simple blog post and I am not (currently) being paid to write this. But if I was, I'd totally find the best articles to back up my points. And then you'd have a few articles to print out and read while on the shitter.  Or just click on because you might be reading this on your iPad.........while on the shitter.

    I feel bad for Scottie Pippen. Jordan should have him as an executive with the Bobcats. It's the least his cigar smoking gambling addicted G.O.A.T. ass can do for his beloved side kick.  How many times do you think Jordan and Pippen even call each other anymore?  Twice a year?  Maybe just a few quick texts on birthdays?

    Monday, August 26, 2013

    Laker Fan Reactions II

    The truth is that Kobe wakes up at 4:30 am to practice. But LakerDouche never mentions this in their comments.
    Laker fans love their rings, their Kobe, and posting crazy online comments. Success has made some of them unrealistic pricks, but who can fault them. If the Warriors won a championship in my lifetime I'd act batshit crazy too. So let's comment on their comments.

    Yeah who thought the old slow spurs would go anywhere. The thing is though that if u ask the REAL players and coaches, not these "analysts", I guarantee they would tell u that a Nash gasol Bryant core is playoff material.

    Yeah, don't ask the "analysts" who's job it is to study the NBA and all things roundball. Like you not listening to your mom because you somehow know better than her. Keep playing Bioshock in your room and don't worry about your home work.  I'll let you know when the 2013-2014 GM Survey comes out in October and we'll see where the REAL players and coaches and....general managers put the Lake Show.

    All them HATERS said, we wouldn't make the playoff last season and not only did we make them we were seated in the 7th spot. So all that hate, is something we are all use too, cause it will just fuel "The Black Mamba".

    This comment makes no sense to me. People were predicting amazing things for the Lakers last year! What are you talking about? The "HATERS" all-caps type screamo reveals the true LakerDouche: you don't educate yourself in basketball reality and only read 200 word posts about the Lakers and come to LakerBlogs to spit your nonsense amongst your friends.

    fuck espn go talk about tebow some more... with their fake ass "sports" commentators that are too proud to admit they are wrong about anything haha that's why I only watch PTI and mike & mike.

    Honestly, great points made. Fuck Tebow.  Even though revealing the fact that you absorb a half hour of a good show and up to 4 hours of simulcast Mike & Mike points to possible joblessness I agree with the point of "tracking" the analyst predictions. So much so that about 8 years ago I once put in work a lot of work with a friend writing down the NBA predictions that Talking Heads made pre-season just so we could see how accurate they were. Of course, it never happened because actual responsibilities got in the way of internet fun. But dude, hold their prediction making hedgehog-esq "I know everything!" attitudes to the fire. Call them out in May, you crazy genius!

    Espn and their truehoop network of haters , is losing more readers every day thanks to crap reporting

    TrueHoop is great. Basketball analytics and basketball nerds are THE BEST. They even get to become VP of Basketball Operations for the Memphis Grizzles sometimes. Please present your numbers of dwindling readership. Do you work for a consulting company and have access to this information? Please become my ESPN insider and share. I'd love to blog about it.

    People who haven't won anything like Charles Berkeley and others. Lakers r going to show everyone who doubt n them. Just because they maybe an older team then other out there, doesn't mean they r to old. It just mean they have to going out there and play smart and play together. Charles need to stop tlking so much, because he couldn't Win a Championship. So ur peace!!! Kobe has 5 Championship and Barkley has none ...

    Ahhh, the joy of autocorrect on your iphone and not checking your own work. Charles "Berkeley". Hilarious.  Now, LakerLuver, please spell "UC Berkeley". Ten bucks you get it wrong.  On top of the typical LakerDouche misspelling/grammar fest (but with a correctly spelled Barkley at the end!), you use the "Kobe's 5 rings" argument which is unbeatable.  These are the entertaining LakerLuvers.  I'm just surprised that this comment didn't include a "HATERS".

    Put it like this basically pau & kobes 2man game for the most part was the biggest reason why we got back to backs champions now you add nash into the mix we"ll be turning heads in a good way

    Thanks for setting up your comment and writing in a conversational tone, LakerDouche. This is the same exact thing you posted 12 months ago but with "dwight" excluded.

    love it when so call fans got no faith in their own team lol...

    Please, LakerLuver, tell me what you call Laker fans who actually question the franchise?  A Warrior fan?  Smart? Blind faith is the sign of a sheep.

    kobe aint never suck

    Correct!  He has rarely sucked....unless he's playing Hero Ball at the end of the game while triple teamed.  In every other game situation he is awesome and I hate that he is so awesome for fans like LakerLuverz.

    ESPN has ALWAYS been east coast bias we don't listen anyway.

    Seriously. I almost  commented on every LakerLuver comment in this article.  They aren't all like this, I know. But they do roam in packs to websites and just can't bite their tongues.  LakerDouche, you obviously listen to ESPN and it's "biased" you idiot.  OK, got that one off my chest.

    Until the next Laker Blog post, kobe ain't never suck

    Laker Fans Reactions

    Laker Fans love to react to Laker Newz

    Laker fans love their rings, their Kobe, and posting crazy online comments. Success has made some of them unrealistic pricks, but who can fault them. If the Warriors won a championship in my lifetime I'd act batshit crazy too. So let's comment on their comments.

    The "Dwight Signed Somewhere Else" Edition

    "Dwight made his choose and that's ok. Yes he made the wrong choose, but wat is done is done and it can't b change now. Lakers will show Dwight wat he could have had if he had stay. So all I have to say is Go Lakers!!!"

    Ralph Wiggam has a lot to say about choo choo choosing. Aside from the typical LakerLuver grammar, this sounds a lot like Cleveland Cavelier's Owner Dan Gilbert's comic-sans fueled letter after "The Decision". I'm so sorry, LakerPoster, but the Rockets are going to be 20 games better than the Lakers this year.  Jodi Meeks.  Swaggy P.The Powerful Chris Kaman. Robert Sacre. Jordan Farmar 2.0. It's safer for LakerLuvers to focus on the rings and Kobe.

    "Neither Melo nor LeBron will be Lakers. I don't think the fans would want them in LA and I'm pretty sure Kobe won't be okay with that either. We need to sign good role players instead of stacking the team with superstars. How about try to fill up the bench with good young defensive minded players?"

    Yeah, because surrounding a 35 year old Kobe with 300,000 miles on him with role players should lead to about 4-12 more Western Conference Championships, right?  Oh, and Kobe will recover from a ruptured Achilles to play 40 minutes on October 29th vs. The Clippers and probably put up like 36/8/7. Kobe is an alien and will just go to Germany and will win at least 2 more rings.  Just gotta get CupCheck and Buss, The Jimmy Edition to find some "good young defensive minded players". Sounds easy enough.  Find them CupCheck. And hurry up already.

    both buss's should step down and let jerry west do some adjusting as for he would have identical ways as there father mr buss did.
    Go ahead and take a minute. Re-read those 25 words again.  Done? Got it? Good. One magical trait of LakerLuvers is their ability to say so much with so few keystrokes.  Twitter was made for these fans.
    Step 1: two of the three Buss children should step away from the organization. I'm assuming LakerCommenter means hot Jeanie and uncomfortable patriarch Jimmy?  What about Joey and the Defenders? Is his role safe?
    Step2: Jerry West appears out of thin air.  He leaves his consultant role with the Warriors and takes over as what I'm guessing is President of the Lakers. Firing CupCheck wasn't apart of the 25 word diatribe.  Plus, West has already done the Laker GM thing before with great success.  And come to think of it Jerry West does have "identical ways" to the late Jerry Buss.  They're like brothers from a different mother.

    Tangent: Robin Thicke's next hit should be named "Identical Ways".  Put it in the red book!

    Thursday, August 8, 2013

    Steph Curry Highlights 2012-2013 Season

    In one word? Crafty. The Curry Combo Curry Pullback Curry Between The Legs Rock

    Tuesday, August 6, 2013

    This Egyptian OKC Thunder Fan is AWESOME

    The passion for this franchise is off the chain. Even if this is fake I love the shit out of it. I need to find out who this guy is and follow him on Twitter.