Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Nextians Book Club, Installment 1

Installment #1 in the Nextians Book Club comes to us from author Trey Hamburger. Trey brings us a true story of his recent struggles with ghosts/aliens stemming from a floating Hot Pocket incident his friend Derek had. It's a magical tale much like the one of his cousin Robert Hamburger who released the controversial "Real Ultimate Power" adventures detailing the feats of ninjas and rhinos some four years ago.

Please read the recent press release by Trey and enjoy his masterpiece. Available on Amazon.

Dear amigos and amigas,

I have discovered some major shit.

And it has something to do with Ghosts/Aliens. Now wait, before you start scoffing, think about it for a second. There has got to be some shit out there that nobody can explain. And I’m not talking about the two guys who went looking for UFOs, discover a pick-up truck FULL of Mexicans, and ended up getting into a huge fight. I’m talking about REAL Paranormal Activity.
Maybe you never realized you were searching for something like that, but consider this: What about the time you heard some dude moan and there were no moaning dudes around? Or what about the time you were at a stop light, and you saw this owl just sitting there, and it mouthed your name.

At this point you might be asking why someone like myself has suddenly acquired an intellectual curiosity after a lifelong passion for non-intellectual endeavors, like jerking my gherkin. Well, listen to this. Me and Mike Stevens have interfaced with a dude who might be from another dimension, or India. And if that doesn’t convince you, Derek Wood is willing to give personal testimony that he has witnessed a TELEPORTING HOT POCKET.

I have collected my studies over the past week titled GHOSTS/ALIENS so you guys will have proof of what I’m talking about. (I’m not a dude who just says stuff. Trust me, if I were making this shit up, I would be saying it was 10 Hot Pockets Floating, NOT ONE.) If you want to help out, then check out http://www.ghostsaliens.net/ for combat tips and end-times notices. Also, if you have a buddy that might be interested in this type of thing, make sure to tell them too.

Thank you and farewell,

Trey Hamburger, amateur scientist/pressure-point expert “cousin” of Robert Hamburger email: realultimatepower@hotmail.com

P.S. If you don’t hear from me again, I’m probably stuck in a trans-dimensional cheese web.

1 comment:

Hyland said...

This is literary genius. Check out Derek's story of the Hot Pocket....truly intriguing.