Mr. Rainmaker

Mark Titus of the Ohio State Basketball Team of the NC2A has been challenged by many of his readers that he can't actually play the game. Being that he spends more time feverishly writing on his website and connecting with fans and serenading Evan Turner (the John Wall of the NCAA before he got hurt, then John Wall was John Wall, but now he's back) than actually making layups, I can see why.

This video changed my life and made me a better basketball player, and I expect it to do the same for you.

Gil Zero: The Timeline

The first part of The Sportsguy's podcast with "buddy" House gives us a good breakdown on what may have happened in the Gils Gunz situation. Oh, and by the way in case you haven't heard, Gilbert Arenas has been suspended indefinitely without pay by Csar Stern.

CHECK IT OUT YO

John Callipari: Asshole

I love the "Information Age" we are living in. It allows us pions to understand what's really going on instead of being forced to drink the Kool Aid. The Wire opened up our eyes to what's really going on in our classist 'merican society. TMZ showed us way too much about Tiger Woods and his freaky sex life instead of the milk toast image that IMG tried to cram down our throats. Oprah talks about her vajayjay and teaches our entire culture a new word.

But most importantly, Outside The Lines on ESPN has been asking the really hard questions and getting amazing answers year after year. Thank you, Bob Ley. Please enjoy this tidbit on why the NCAA sucks so much harder than NBA (even though sometimes there are buzzer beaters during March Madness).

Best Friends: Zach Randolph and Marc Gasol

A failed Allen Iverson experiment and a 1 - 8 start by the usually woeful Memphis Grizzlies had most of us thinking that, yet again, the Grizz were just being the Grizz. Since the turmoil, the team of misfit toys has gone 12-7 defeating the likes of Dallas, Cleveland and (to a lesser extent) Miami. At 13-15, these guys are legit. Or at least better than The Warriors.

The Commercial Appeal's Scott Cacciola (I read him EVERY day) informs us how much of this success does not come from OJ Mayo and Rudy Gay jacking up ill-timed jumpers with hands in their faces (which they will never stop doing). But it comes from the unusual friendship between Zach Randolph and Marc Gasol.



Can you imagine a more strange pairing of pal-ness? The hairy Spainary and the thugg life selfish locker room destroyer? You can bet that this is something to OG Nextian will be keeping his eye on.

Steve Nash VitaminWater Infomercial

Is this real? Is this awesome? Is Steve Nash funny?

Johnny Burkhalter: LEGEND

This is one of my favorite YouTube videos/Cheaters episodes of all time. Until it gets taken down from YouTube yet again, please find time to enjoy the Legend of Johnny Burkhalter:



By the way, what kinds of brrrs and wines would you like to drink at our Nextians Basketball Game next month?

Lebron's 2009 vs. Oscar & Wilt's 1962

I pulled this tidbit from TrueHoop and, man, is it a great breakdown of how things were and how things are. Nextians know that Oscar Robinson averaged a trip-dub in 1962. This was also the year that Chamberlain exploded for a record 100 points in a game. Were these guys really that much better stat wise than the Lebron of '08/'09? When you factor in pace of play, your eyes are opened. From TrueHoop:

Wow. Wow. Wow. 40.1 points, 10.3 rebounds and 10 assists per game. According to Neil Paine of Basketball-Reference, that's what LeBron James would be averaging if he played at the same pace (possessions per 48 minutes) that Oscar Robertson did in 1962 when he became the only person ever to average a triple double. Paine writes: "1962, if you recall, was not only the year Oscar averaged a triple-double, but also the season Wilt Chamberlain did all sorts of ludicrous things, like scoring 100 points in a game and averaging 50.4 per. He also averaged 26 rebounds a night; Bill Russell averaged 24. The stat-stuffing that went on that year truly boggles the mind. ... Okay, so you've all seen Wilt and Oscar's numbers from 1962, but have you ever sat down and looked at the league averages that year? In '62, the average team took 107.7 shots per game. By comparison, this year the average team takes 80.2 FGA/G. If we use a regression to estimate turnovers & offensive rebounds, the league pace factor for 1962 was 125.5 possessions/48 minutes, whereas this year it's 91.7. Oscar's Royals averaged 124.7 poss/48, while Wilt's Warriors put up a staggering 129.7 (the highest mark in the league). On the other hand, the 2009 Cavs are averaging a mere 89.2 poss/48. It turns out that the simplest explanation for the crazy statistical feats of 1961-62 (and the early sixties in general) is just that the league was playing at a much faster tempo in those days, with more possessions affording players more opportunities to amass gaudy counting statistics. Let's say LeBron '09 could switch paces (note that I didn't say "places”, which is another argument entirely) with Oscar '62 ... That means we would have to scale down the Big O's per-game numbers by multiplying them by .715, giving Robertson a far more reasonable line of 22.0 PPG, 8.9 RPG, & 8.1 APG -- which are still really good numbers, to be sure, but not as crazy as they looked at the breakneck pace of '62. By contrast, we have to multiply LBJ's stats by a factor of 1.4 if we want to see what they would look like if he played at a 1962-style pace. The results: 40.1 PPG, 10.3 RPG, & 10.0 APG!! As you can see, those 35.5 extra possessions per game really make a huge difference when comparing the two players' stats. So, no, LeBron probably will never average an Oscar-esque triple-double in today's NBA ... but it's more a consequence of the league's pace than any failing on his part. Just like we wouldn't say a .400 hitter in the 1894 NL (league BA: .309) was as impressive as Ted Williams hitting .406 in the 1941 AL (league BA: .266), basketball fans should keep in mind that the league's pace factor has gone down steadily since its inception, and with those fewer possessions come fewer chances to put up monster stat totals. This isn't meant to denigrate Oscar and Wilt in any way, but it does mean that their eye-popping stats from back then are, in reality, not quite as impressive as they appear at first glance."

Nextians Reaches the 10-Country Benchmark

Guys, I thought we should all know just how international this blog has become.  According to Google, who knows everything, we've had blog readers from the following international hotbeds of hoops:

1. USA
   
2. Australia
   
3. Canada
   
4. Romania
   
5. Singapore
   
6. Italy
   
7. Serbia
   
8. UK
   
9. Turkey
   
10. Germany

Granted, the last 6 on the list have only one visit each, but we're at least making some international noise.  Cam, when are you gonna put some ads on this thing and start making some straight cash homie?

You Build It Up; Then it All Falls Down

Thanks be to Toomie for passing along THIS ARTICLE by the forever funky Rick Bucher. Toomie tried to post it to this blog, but was too lazy to figure out how to make it work. I guess he had some Christmas Shopping to do.

Incredible "Pop" Culture Reference # 63: Riskay

This MUSIC VIDEO by Riskay dropped in early 2008. In case you haven't seen it yet, I'd highly advise heading over to youtube to check it out. Unfortunately, due to the as*holes over at Riskay's record company, we are not allowed to embed this video. The easy to use "push play" function is something I like to provide to all dedicated Nextian readers/viewers. So I can only give you the shitty link above. Sorry.

Shout out to Bilbo Baggins for emailing me this vid. Much love. And much love for destroying that ring by throwing it in the lava in Mt. Doom. You are an incredible furry footed friend.

Simpsons on the NBA

Here are a few clips from last Sunday's episode. It looks like the Simpsons are trying to become relevant again by doing their version of the Sonics takeover.

Ghost/Aliens Update

Dudes and Dudettes: beware as paranormal attacks can happen at any time. And don't let any ghosts lay a log on your back.

Dwayne Wade abuses the Grizzlies

You gotta love this video of Dwayne Wade taking out the future of the Grizzlies in one swift crossover dribble. Talk about pulling the rug out from underneath Rudy Gay and OJ Mayo:



Thankfully, OJ Mayo is currently the top ranked fantasy rookie in basketball. He's even ahead of Rudy Gay. Heck, he's even ahead of Kevin Love (aka "Splash") who Kevin McHale geniously traded OJ for in the pre-season. On a related note, Kevn McHale had his GM title stripped and is now sucking the life out of the Timberwolves from the bench as their coach. Maybe someday Love will learn that the McHale up and under move. Then we can call it the Love Up and Under. But probably not.

NBA Quiz

How many can you NBA teams can you list in 3 minutes? I missed 3 teams and spent 40 seconds racking my brain trying to figure out who they were. Post a comment on how well you did. I bet Pablo gets 7 right.

And no re-doing the test. One time only!

PLAY HERE

Holy Crap. I need to find a way to get this.........

Many of the thousands of Nextians who read this blog probably enjoyed my "Darko Has Anger Issues" post from a few days back. Well, Mr. Milicic's game worn, ripped jersey is now up for auction at the NBA's charity site. Holy Crap!!

Currently the high bid sits at $606. If there's a more frivilous spending of greenbacks out there (aside from bailing out GM) I haven't seen it. But I am -thisclose- to saying "fcuk it" and throw down the credit card to help the needy kids of St. Jude Hospital. Dang, this would really make my life complete. Well, nearly complete. When Monta finally returns to the Dubs things would be more complete-er.

LA Gear

Twenty years ago, LA Gear hit the ground running. They put tons of dollars into marketing strange looking sneakers with a combination of Air Jordan and Keds influences. Heck, even Magic Johnson was pimping these fu-fu kicks. Speaking of fu-fu:

Well, LA Gear is back with twenty year anniversary kicks that have a striking similarity to the Air Jordan III's (in both price and look).

And if you don't remember what made LA Gear so amazing, it was their commercials that their marketing department no doubtedly claimed as "next level" and "forward thinking".

LA Gears will get you laid!



And this commercial gives LA Gear some serious "street" cred for guys who play basketball at night (drunken Markwith):

Nene Abuses The Kings

Did anyone else witness Nene dunking three times in a row on the hapless Sacramento Queens on Saturday? I guess with Brad Miller as your center you're not gonna get a lot of toughness underneath the basket. Yeah, Miller had 0 points, 5 boards, and a very helpful steal in the game. Queens lost 118-85



In related news, I am enjoying B-Mill on my Nextians fantasy squad. Could this be why I am in 12th place by 10 points? Mostly.

Hulu Monday

Here's an incredible video that has nothing to do with basketball. If you can believe it, this was brought to me by fellow Nextian Anthony Rossi who is far from an internets maven and will likely never see this post on a blog created for his fantasy sports league that he won't respond to a trade in. What a dickhead.

Glen "Big Cry Baby" Davis

I've always been curious about how Glen "Big Baby" Davis of the Boston Celtics via LSU got his nickname. But that fleeting mind question has easily escaped with distractions of sandwiches, light beer and/or porn combined with the fact that I could give a sh*t about his overweight, bench riding ass. But then the highlights of Glen getting chewed out by KG in the middle of last Thursday's Celtics vs. Raptors game surfaced and the reason for his nickname became clear: Dude's a pussy.



In other NBA nickname news, Matt Bonner, newly assigned starting center of the San Antonio Spurs, is called "Red Rocket". Bonner.........Boner.........Red Rocket.........canine erections. Damn, I'm smart.

Maggette Not Paying Off for Warriors

While he may not be bad enough to go below the Curry Line, Corey Maggette may not be all he was made up to be for the Warriors:

The Eddy Curry Line was established to put a spotlight on how truly anemic Curry's overall fantasy line is. The standard: a player must average more turnovers than assists, steals, and blocks combined – in order to qualify, a player must have appeared in at least half of his team's games and averaged at least 20 minutes of playing time.

Chris Mannix, Inside the NBA blogger for SI, wrote:

Corey Maggette has proved to be a prolific scorer throughout his 10-year career. What he hasn't proved to be, however, is much else. Golden State's third-leading scorer this season (19.7 points), Maggette has become the Bay Area's black hole.

Five games, five Golden State losses and a more than 2:1 turnover-to-assist ratio. Maggette's selfish play hasn't gone unnoticed by other players. According to sources, after the final buzzer against Boston, Celtics forward Kevin Garnett turned to Maggette and shouted, "Way to get your numbers."

"He just puts his head down and goes to the basket," an Eastern Conference scout said. "He doesn't even look to pass."

Word from team sources is that the Warriors are already regretting signing Maggette to a five-year, $50 million deal last offseason. When Monta Ellis returns to the lineup early next year, Golden State will have to figure out how to spread the wealth among three players (Ellis, Jamal Crawford and Maggette) who aren't very good at spreading it.